The Daishonin writes, "You need not seek far for an example" (WND, 614). It is our own example of personal struggle—not somebody else's—that produces sympathy and understanding in those around us.
- from Essay on Kamata Chapter by Daisaku Ikeda
I've had only six opportunities to participate in May contribution and I have participated each time without struggle. This lack of struggle is my benefit and obstacle simultaneously. I'm fortunate because so far in my life I've never had any financial obstacles. But for that same reason, giving has never been faith-based. I would just pick the number, write the check, and go on my merry way. The first five times were exactly that way, but this year, finally, was different.
In 2006, shortly after the contribution period, I had a faith-altering experience. It was around that time that I began withdrawing from the organization – even going so far as planning to spend the rest of my YWD days in hiding before graduating as soon as possible and disappearing altogether! I decided to go to the YWD conference just because it was the 'right thing to do' as the Vice Region leader. As usual, I had no financial struggles to go…just a bad attitude and a quiet demeanor. Little did I know that withdrawing was really the lioness in me pulling back in preparation to pounce!
During the conference, I had multiple opportunities to hear life-changing guidance and experiences that were true laser beams to my heart. They completely flipped the way I thought about myself, my practice, and my fellow YWD. I finally realized I absolutely had to practice from my heart. With my renewed energy, I put as much passion into my daimoku and study as I could. My life condition sky-rocketed and it showed in the YWD. I felt so much appreciation, I wanted to participate in May contribution right then, but it was still months away. I fought hard with the YWD for months before finally hitting a major challenge.
In December 2006 my father passed away. As an only child, with both parents now deceased, and the only person in my entire family to practice, I suddenly felt very alone. I really had to fight my fundamental darkness all winter and spring to strengthen my resolve and chant that vibrant daimoku again. This week I can proudly say I was finally able to break through and joyfully participated in May contribution. I was again able to meet my goal without financial struggle, but my faith-struggle has really allowed me to give with a true sense of appreciation. I always felt I couldn't encourage the YWD who were struggling with finances, but I now realize the struggle is never really anywhere but inside of us anyway. As each of us wins, we create the momentum for those around us to win as well – no matter what the challenge. We are Buddhas! And through our struggle, we uncover our fundamental enlightenment.
Nicole D. Collier Southeast
RegionVice YWD Leader
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